This is the kind of thing that just encourages me not to clean upstairs. (Part 1, maybe?)

<The following post contains the transcribed contents of papers I found in a shoebox while cleaning the crawlspace upstairs. I have tried to make it as clear as possible which commentary is mine (by italicizing and bracketing my words) so you can differentiate me describing the material, and the various makers and handwritten notes that appear on the material. None of the handwritten notes indicate their authors and the handwriting is different in several places indicating multiple writers.

 I have no idea who they belong to- I must assume that the previous owner was also unaware of them, as he was a Pella local and a music pastor at the smallest church here in town. It seems extremely unlikely that he would have contact with anyone in England, or Egypt. I am currently attempting to contact him to get some information on the previous owner, who sold the house in 2003.>

Dec 12, 2002 0014GMT

From: theodorus.justin.k@oxford.edu

To: theodorus.edward.m@oxford.edu

Subject: This is getting old

Dad,

Got another packet from XXXX in Cairo. Unlike the previous two this one simply contained some assorted loose-leaf papers. I have scanned and included them for you. I am no longer convinced that this is an elaborate hoax. Instead I believe this is the work of a madman who has somehow found out about your research and believes he is providing some great insight to your studies on the ancient glyphs of various cultures.

I have forwarded the first two packets containing the (alleged) Aboriginal Death mask and the (alleged, again) dust from the ancient Mesoamerican tomb structure. These sorts of things are, of course not my area of expertise. The £7.37 was either wasted insuring a paper-mâché mask and some dirt or spend woefully underinsuring some rather valuable artifacts. I don't not care either way, and I grow tired of this distraction from my botanical research.

I am tired of receiving these packages. Please inform your friend that if he wishes to continue "helping" you in your research he should direct packages to you. Any future packages from XXXX in Cairo will be marked return to sender and refused by me.

I will see you and mum at Christmas as usual. Perhaps then you will be able to say "Gotcha" and reveal that you are XXXX in Cairo- in which case I demand to know how you pulled off such a clever mail fraud- as I have verified twice with the parcel service that the package did in fact originate in Cairo. Ellen sends her love, etc. etc.

-Justin

Dec. 12th 2002 0015 GMT

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Date: 12 Feb 2002
Message-ID: <AANLkTi=S7H3S3d2Pb-M09C5q=zVNFG5TVbQQwfw=1HZG@mail.oxford.edu>
Subject: This is getting old
From: Justin Korgath Theodorus < theodorus.justin.k@oxford.edu >
To: Edward Malefector Theodorus < theodorus.edward.m@oxford.edu >
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-

<There is a large discoloration at the end of this piece of paper, similar to the effect of spilling water on paper then using a hair dryer to dry the page back out. The mark however smells terrible, an odor I cannot fully describe but it haunts me, literally haunts me when I lie awake at night. I cannot imagine the chemical or biological substance this paper touched to create such a stench.>

Dec 13, 2002 1257GMT

From: theodorus.justin.k@oxford.edu

To: Ed.Theo@gmail.com

Subject: Re: This is getting old

Dad,

Is there something wrong with your university account? I know you've been in the bush in the past few months but your email should still get forwarded to your remote laptop, right? Let me know when you get this I got another damn package from XXXX in Cairo that I want to discuss with you.

-Justin

<There are eight tiny holes through the paper here arranged thusly: ҉>

Dec 13, 2010 1258GMT

From: Ed.Theo@gmail.com

To:  theodorus.justin.k@oxford.edu

Subject: Out Of Office

Greetings,

This is an automated notification that I am currently in the field and may not have access to my email. I will attempt to respond to your email as soon as I am able.

-Ed

Ne timeas ignotis, pavor ignorantia <There is a quick handwritten scrawl after the e-mail signature:>

"Pretentious bastard"

<Handwritten note at end of page, red ink, messy block printing, different hand than the two word epithet above:>

 "Here there appear 6 lines of uninteligible [sic] characters and glyphs, the likes of which I have never seen appear in any font or typeface. When I attempted to cut and paste them into a Word document it displayed only three pound signs and one single character similar to an ampersand but... angrier, is the only way I can describe it. I will attempt to draw it here:

###(a symbol I am unable to reproduce, but the above description is... accurate. there are three underlines beneath the final symbol, and they grow progressively darker and have deeper indentation as if the pen was pressed harder and harder against the paper.)

<End of handwritten note>

<This next portion appears to be, although I cannot be certain, the "scanned loose-leaf papers" referenced in the first email. Once I scan them myself, or transcribe them- I'm a little frightened to bring them to work to use the scanner there!- I will post their contents. If you have any knowledge of the events mentioned here please contact me, I will gladly turn over all the contents of this mysterious shoebox. Frankly it makes me uneasy just looking at its ragged dusty frame. >