Names for my Wife

It's rare that one uses another person's actual name when they are in a close relationship. It's strange, but generally true. At work I'm likely to call someone Laura or Jon or whatever. But my best friends I call, buddy or man, or dude. It seems excessively formal to call someone by their real name when you've stayed up all night with them playing Mario Kart or hunted for crawdads in a river together. It's even more so with your spouse, I think.

I almost never say the word Christy unless I'm upset. Usually it's the old standbys, baby, honey, etc. I do however have some unique ones to share with you.

a) Socks
I frequently refer to my wife as this particular piece of apparel. Socks are great and there are few clothing related pleasures greater than putting on clean socks, or warm socks when you're very cold, or thick padded socks before going on a long walk etc. Socks are great. My wife is great. It seemed an easy leap to begin calling her socks.

b) Dumple
I didn't coin this term, it's actually something Strongbad came up with as a sports mascot. It just rolls off the tongue so wonderfully and is affectionate, diminutive and just a little aggressively playful. All of these things describe my wife.Also it vaguely elicits the word "dummy" so I can say it when I'm upset without regretting it later but still allow those immediate impulses to lash out a method of escaping.

c) Princess Takesforeverella
This is what I call my wife when, well, it's pretty self explanatory. It is my firm belief that our desire to get ready for something quickly is always in inverse proportion. This is what I call her when she is holding us up. Lazy bum is hers for when the roles are reversed.

d) Squishmitten
I have no idea. It just came out. She responded to it. It stuck

e) Whatever the last noun of the previous sentence was.
This is why our conversations are always very juvenile sounding to outsider. "Do you want green beans?" "YOU are a green bean." It's nice to have your work done for you.

So what are your pet names?